Les acouphènes électoraux du Parti Québécois

Vous savez ce qu’est un acouphène? Par paresse, je vais vous donner la définition de Wikipedia:

L’acouphène (du grec ancien : ακούω « entendre » et φωνή « voix ») est une sensation auditive non liée à un son généré par une vibration d’origine extérieure à l’organisme et inaudible par l’entourage. Le son perçu peut ressembler à un bourdonnement, un sifflement ou même à un tintement ressenti dans le crâne ou dans l’oreille, d’un seul côté ou des deux.

Dans la vraie vie, je souffre d’acouphène. En tout temps, j’entends un silement plus ou moins fort dans les oreilles. Pour vous aider à comprendre ce que j’entends, imaginez un refrigérateur qui sile ou le chant des criquets les soirs d’été. Moi, j’entends ça en permanence. Lorsque je me couche en silence, ces criquets m’accompagnent dans la tête jusqu’à ce que je m’endorme. Et s’il faut que j’aille à un concert rock en soirée, les criquets se transforment en un fort son aigu continu comme lorsque dans le temps, la télé de Radio-Canada cessait de diffuser la nuit.

Bref, vous comprenez que ce n’est pas très agréable.

Et j’ai pensé pendant longtemps que tout le monde souffrait de ça. Jusqu’au jour où je suis tombé sur un reportage à Découverte au début de la vingtaine disant que x% de la population en avait. J’étais convaincu que c’était normal. Finalement, ça ne l’était pas mais on ne peut pas y changer grand chose. Alors je tolère presque en silence.

Ce que je tolère moins par contre, c’est les acouphènes électoraux qu’on tente de nous envoyer. La plupart des gens ne s’en rendent pas compte mais ils sont ominprésents.

Comment je définirais les « acouphènes électoraux »? Je dirais que c’est un message, un spin lancé par nos politiciens qui ne restent pas très longtemps dans l’actualité mais qui continuent à avoir un effet subliminal dans notre tête jusqu’au moment où on tient le fameux crayon qui, quelques secondes plus tard fera un X dans un des cercles de notre bulletin de vote.

Et je crois qu’à cette élection-ci, le spécialiste de l’acouphène électorale, envers ou contre lui, c’est le Parti Québecois.

Le premier acouphène a jusqu’à date joué contre le PQ: le fameux « je veux léguer à mes enfants un pays » de Pierre-Karl « poing dans les airs » Péladeau. Dès le jour de sa déclaration, j’écrivais on this very web site qu’il était prématuré de prédire une victoire majoritaire du PQ à cause de son arrivée mais surtout à cause de sa déclaration. Si tout va bien, le temps est en voie de me donner raison et le jour du vote, plusieurs auront une pensée pour PKP avant de mettre leur X sur leur bulletin de vote. Certains voteront PQ pour ça, d’autres contre ça.

Le deuxième, c’est bien sûr la Charte. Le « Un vote pour le PQ est un vote pour la Charte » de Bernie Drainville rappelera aux gens ouverts sur le monde que d’élire un parti qui flirte avec la xénophobie soft ne donnera pas une bonne image de notre nation et ne représente pas qui le « Nous » et le « Eux » sommes. L’époque des curés qui ont peur que les étrangers non catholiques viennent corrompre les bonnes moeurs de leurs bons paroissiens dociles et brainwashés est révolue et c’est tant mieux. La majorité des gens le sait maintenant que « Le Bonhomme Sept Heures » n’est qu’une légende et que ce n’est qu’une traduction libre des mots anglais « Bone Setter », qui veut dire « ramancheur ». Mais d’autres sont peureux de nature et ce silement leur fera voter PQ.

L’autre acouphène pénible et lancinant est celui qui explique aussi pourquoi je suis un souverainiste en attente qui ne peut voter Oui présentement: celui de la victimite aiguë du PQ. Un projet de pays basé sur l’apitoiement et sur le « il nous fait mal alors faut se protéger de lui » me pue au nez. En quelques heures, le PQ s’est dit victime du vote des étudiants anglophones, victime du salissage des anti-Charte à la sauce péquiste et victime de la « campagne de peur » du méchant Philippe Couillard qui veut faire déraper la campagne selon Pauline Marois.

Ces trois acouphènes nous accompagneront tous à coup sûr jusqu’au jour du vote. Et si les derniers sondages sont exactes, ils nuiront au PQ plus qu’ils ne l’aideront. Et c’est tant mieux.

Alors espérons que ces trois acouphènes transformeront la mouture 2014 du Parti Québécois en Bloc Québécois de 2011, c’est-à-dire en un parti devenu, pardonnez-moi l’anglicisme messieurs de la SSJB, « irrelevant »!

C’est ça, le troisième côté de la médaille… en Haute Dannynition.

Feu Bum Intello

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